Hi,  I'm finally back after an awful lot of hassle, (which, let's face it, we can all do without) and several bald spots from tearing my hair our.  Blogger will want to know my inside leg measurement on their "GREAT NEW LOOK WEBSITE" soon, I shouldn't wonder.  It wouldn't surprise me in the least.  They seem to want everything else. 

 They're not terribly helpful when you get stuck.  The best they seem to be able to come up with is "click on HELP" which gives you volumes of small print on about WHAT A BLOG IS, or WHY YOU NEED TO BLOG, but NOT how to unstick yourself if you get stuck.
   
     If you happen to come accross a telephone number, don't get too excited.  A high pitched "girly" voice will refer you to the website.  Perish the thought their should be anyone you can actually talk to.  That would be far too simple.

     I going now, because if I go on with this, I will find it can't be posted because I'm wearing the wrong bra, or something. 

     Anyway toodleoo for a bit.  I'm off to Rome tomorrow.

 

Magpie 107

 He painted my portrait, did Paul,

And boy, did my pride take a fall!
I’ve either changed sex,
Or I need some new specs
‘Coz it doesn’t look like me at all.

MAGPIE 107

Magpie 107

 He painted my portrait, did Paul,

And boy, did my pride take a fall!
I’ve either changed sex,
Or I need some new specs
‘Coz it doesn’t look like me at all.

(Sorry, I couldn't save the picture.)

MAGPIE TALES 106

                                                                  

DREAMS OF BUYING SOUP

I wonder now, soup

Does one eat it or drink it?
Peculiar thought, but
I so often think it.
Does one eat it like food?
Does one drink it like squash?
Am I crouching or kneeling,
Or shrunk in the wash?

MAGPIE TALES 105

                                                          

Phone A Rainbow

 Violet, purple and neon green,

Orange and very dark blue,
I can sing a phone box,
Sing a phone box,
And a cycle too.

 Apologies to “The Rainbow Song”, but this one was difficult

MAGPIE TALES 104

     STUNT FOR CHARITY

With a painted expression

Of absolute bliss,

She lay back on the

Bloke-covered floor,

But later she wished Seb

Would just move his hand,

As her armpit was

Getting quite sore.

MAGPIE TALES 103

                                                                        

SUBTLE REVENGE

I bought this at a car boot
So slinky, posh and bright
It only cost me fifty P,
I fell for it at sight

 Looks a right treat on me mantle,

With them fingers long and tall,
Underneath my Albert’s photo
Hanging up there on the wall.

  His bit of stuff ‘ad ‘ands like that,

The cow! She fleeced ‘im rotten,
He didn’t think I knew of ‘er,
But no, I’ve not forgotten.